Had A Good Day (:

"That moment when you turn to look at your crush and you notice he's already looking at you." ~Unknown

3:29 here, and I really should be doing my homework, but instead I'm blogging and talking on the phone with my best friend Kayla... Well today I had a good day, not going to lie. I was having a really crappy day yesterday, but I made some muffins 1st period, talked to this guy I like today a lot, skipped half of 8th period without getting in trouble, and even took a nap 9th period. Overall it was good. Another good thing about my day, is that I looked at "him" and felt okay. Typically whenever I look at him, I always get this wretched feeling inside my stomach and chest that hurts, and it makes me upset, because I know we can't date.. but today? It wasn't entirely there. Maybe it was because I stop expecting so much.. Maybe it was because I told myself to just stop trying so hard. Whatever the reason, it felt nice to feel relaxed and not be hurt. But in all honesty, I still get so weak when he looks at me.. that's something I'll never particularly say, but always feel.

Well, my mind isn't too cluttered with feelings and thoughts now. I'm overall happy and content. Maybe later I'll blog some more on this post. For now, I'm going to make some vocabulary index card, and then I'm gonna go play out in the snow with Brianna because she just called. Woohoo :D

Edit; So I'm back online blogging, just because I can't exactly shake these feelings I woke up with. I fell asleep at 8:00 ishh and now I woke up and it's 12:28. This certain person came up in my newsfeed a lot.. and it's really hard to pull myself back from talking to this person so much, because I get very clingy and all I want is really to talk. Like everytime we talk, I get really happy, nobody even understands. Walking in the halls, covering my mouth , and holding my stomach from laughter. And oddly, this song from Hannah Montana is reminding me of how I feel..

"I'll be acting through my tears, guess you'll never know that I should win an Oscar for this scene I'm in. If we were a movie, you'd be the right guy, and I'd be the best friend that you'd fall in love with at the end.."

Those lyrics just sum it up pretty well. I was gonna make that my Facebook status, but I don't want him seeing it and feeling bad. He feels bad so easily.. it's cute, but it makes me feel like a jerk so I tend to avoid doing it.

Day 2 of holding back to avoid clingyness. Day.. like I don't even know.. 14? Of trying to get over it. I don't exactly want to like him.. I mean yeah, he's amazing and awesome and all, but when you like someone and it doesn't go anywhere, it just kind of hurts to see them and talk to the, 

On a positive note, I wrote a new song ! :) Lyrics are down, now I just need a beat and some notes.

Uhh I'll probably post it on youtube or something when I'm done with it completely.

So yeah.

My mind is kind of jumbled, and I didn't even start my homework because I've been clustered with this stuff on my mind, so I should probably get started. I'm really upset, I don't know if I can even think.

Bye everyonee <3